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today, like most days, i was cursing moose at first but after a few steps out the door i felt much more wakeful and found that i was actually enjoying things. we walked up a hill and played on a patch of grass for a minute, and then i glanced back the way we had came and was alarmed to see a crumpled black pile on the path.

i knew that if it had been there when i walked up the hill i would have noticed. it looked like a small animal. or perhaps a bird with a broken wing. i was worried that if we approached moose would bite it, as he is sometimes aggressive with other animals. i briefly considered tying him to the balance beam (we have a "universal gym" trail), but then i worried that he could bite another dog if other walkers passed. stress! finally i decided to see what we were dealing with first, and then take him home and return with medical supplies if needed.

i approached the still mass slowly, holding moose tightly at heel. he seemed unconcerned. as i neared it became suddenly, horribly clear that the crumpled pile was the pair of black underwear i had worn yesterday, shaken from my pantsleg as i stumbled up the trail. after quickly surveying the surrounding area i snatched them from the ground and stuffed them into my pocket.

must start wearing contacts on a.m. walks.

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